Have you emerged from your stay-at-home life yet? I haven’t, but I’ve seen lots of posts on social media of people out and about.
As I consider what my first socially distanced activities might be, one thing that is becoming clear is the patterns I’ve developed over these last few months. Without the usual external influence, I’ve become very set in certain routines. Mental, emotional, logistical, and physical, and not all of them are positive.
These negative habits are the ones that we want to confront DAILY because they hold us back from being the best version of ourselves.
Some of the patterns that hold us back are:
Negative self talk
Emotional eating
Perfectionism
Comparing ourselves to others
All of these patterns thrive on us being disconnected and afraid of the icky feeling that we get when we get them under a light. Even though this goes directly against our human nature impulse of "feel good NOW/deal with consequences LATER”, we gotta put on our adult undies, and go through temporary discomfort now, so we can succeed at what we want most.
Tool #1: Ask yourself "am I giving up what I want MOST for what feels easy in this moment?"
These patters also trick us into thinking we have no control over them. “That’s just how I am” or “I’m too busy to _____”.
To take responsibility for our choices does not mean we shame or criticize ourselves. That route is harmful and totally counterproductive. To take responsibility means we give ourselves the kindness that is clarity (thank you, Brene Brown) and the feeling of empowerment that comes along with it.
Tool #2: Rewrite the script. Rather than saying "I have to", say "I CHOOSE to".
Maybe getting clarity on these ickier patters was too much while in isolation. Maybe isolation was the perfect opportunity for you to spend some extra time with ourself and our thought. Either way, let’s keep going or let’s get started. Just like we don't develop habits overnight, we aren't going to undo habits overnight.
Tool #3: Consistency, not force, is the ticket with these lil’ stinkers. Take it one day at a time, and SMALL WINS COUNT.
I’m not saying this is EASY work. It’s not. I am PROMISING you that it is worthwhile work :)
What are some patterns you’ve developed? What are some things your shadow side likes? Shoot me an email! I would love to hear about it. Sarah@abundelicious.com
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The Author:
Hi! My name is Sarah. I'm into clean eating, traveling (beach please), helping folks eat and feel better, gardening (not very well), and bopping around my neighborhood with my dog. Thanks for reading!
